In this age of social networking and technology, it’s no surprise that everyone is all about being popular. Who has the most friends and who has the most followers are now one of the first criteria that is checked before we actually get to know someone. Everyone naturally wants to be liked by everyone else, and in turn get as many friends as they can. Thus, the world is a breeding ground for brittle friendships. Why do I say brittle? Simply because almost all friendships are based on conditions. No matter how close you are to someone, look carefully and you will spot a condition.
Of course, there are true friends out there—and obtaining one of them is all you really need in this life, although none would also suffice. I think its time that everyone should analyze the relationships in their life and remove from it all forms of negativity. I believe that if everyone learned to be a better, truer friend, the world would be so much of a better place. Of course I’m not going to include the extremely obvious points such as being honest, abandoning any ulterior motives, being kind in thought word and speech etc. because these should be a given.
What Are Conditions?
Conditions on a relationship are simply anything that goes on between you and someone else that holds the relationship together—to the point that if it were taken away, the relationship would suffer. Some of the main conditions that have remained prevalent for quite some time are recreational activities. These can include drinking, smoking, sports, video games and much more. If you find that you have a “friendship” with someone based on any condition, try to be without it for once. If things seem strange or even worse, if you don’t feel right about attempting this—then just know that is not a true friendship.
O once used to hang out with a group of friends that used to pretty much meet up just to drink and go out to the club. I was the only one who used to be present and not drink. One day out of curiosity I openly asked everyone there if they would all be together if there was no liquor involved. Needless to say I unintentionally made things a bit awkward and most of them struggled to put their answers together only to spurt out an “of course” that wasn’t very convincing. I know the truth, and they all know the truth as well. A few weeks later, one of them called me to tell me that I was right, and they didn’t feel right about agreeing with me out in the open. True friends should be able to be with each other and do nothing—just being there whole-heartedly should be enough.
Everyone Should Be “Real”
If someone can’t accept one of your traits, or you have to hide certain traits from them—then surprise, surprise…they are not a true friend. Likewise, if you have a problem with a trait of one of your friends and it gets to the point where they have to hide it from you, you aren’t really a good friend either.
A true friend should accept everything that comes with you, only pointing out the negativities that can be improved upon. You should always feel comfortable with being yourself around your friends—you should never have to put on an act to feel accepted and neither should they. You should always be allowed to speak your mind despite any differences in political, religious, environmental etc. issues and beliefs. This brings me to my last section.
The Ability To Agree or Disagree
Being a true friend does not mean having a million things in common. On the contrary it can mean quite the opposite in most cases. As I said before, you should always be able to speak your mind 100% and they should to, and at the end of the day, you both should have it in you to “agree to disagree”. Anyone who doesn’t take the time out to master the art of agreeing to disagree should not call themselves a true friend. All of their friendships will be falsified and just turn into a mere game of using each other and passing time.
Becoming a true friend to all is one of the greatest things you can do. Do not be the backstabbing friend who is always looking for the next opportunity to one-up his peers. Or the greedy friend who only keeps someone around for what goods or services they have to offer. Instead be a true friend, one who will go out of their way for the happiness of another; one that is always available, even when the chips are down. This is what the world needs—true friends.
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